10 Things I thought about during the Super Bowl

1. New Orleans clearly was not ready for Beyonce's jelly as the job of keeping the lights on became a Bugaboo for the facilities people, maybe they didn't pay their Bills, Bills, Bills. After the lights came back on we did learn that the Ravens would be the final Survivor and they would in fact Put a Ring on It.


2. The creative minds of commercials are no longer intelligent or funny. This year's edition of commercials were not up to par with previous years (as I will delve into in a later post today). There were no babies that were amusing, no animals doing incredibly funny things, and no two part commercials. Where have you gone creative teams at marketing companies?


3. CBS hates gambling. One of the biggest prop bets this Super Bowl was the number of times the name Harbaugh would be said by one of the announcers. Knowing this, and apparently wanting Americans to lose large amounts of money, the announcers decided to refer to the brothers as John and Jim rather than Harbaugh. Luckily for me, I did not bet that prop. I did however bet on Alicia Keys.....


4. Alicia loves her some her. The over/under on the National Anthem was 2 minutes and 5 seconds, or 125 seconds. I was positive that I would win this bet - I did research on National Anthem times. Do you realize how tough it is to find the length of time it took people to sing the National Anthem? No one since 2006 had went over 2 minutes when performing the anthem at the Super Bowl, Beyonce lip sang it in 121 seconds at the inauguration, and Kelly Clarkson took only 90 seconds to do it last year. With all this research, it was nearly certain I would be walking away with more money in my bank account, then she started. By my unofficial timing of the ballad, it took her 31 seconds to get to "last gleaming". I thought for sure I was done and it would not be close, then she picked up the speed and gave me hope as she was rounding the corner to the end and began the final sentence with "O'er" at 1:45 seconds. SHE HAD 20 SECONDS TO SAY THE LAST SENTENCE!  Instead, she sang to "Free" and threw her hands in the air, destroying any hope at 125 seconds. When it was all said and done, she took 156.4 SECONDS for the longest rendition in Super Bowl history.

 

5. Jacoby Jones is fast. I mean like really fast. Like really really fast. This speed was on display as he not only ran straight through the first 18 men he came into contact with but then at about the 45 turned it on to another level and took what had been about a yard advantage over a 49er defender and turned it into a laugher, as he JOGGED the final 10 yards into he end zone. As the defender was at about the 15. He created a 14 yard gap on a professional athlete, that's "WOW" speed. Also, he ran 108 yards in 12 seconds. You do the math.


6. Super Bowl MVP is a joke. I get it, Flacco had a good game but the two biggest plays of the game came because of Jacoby Jones. I understand that giving the MVP to a 2nd string WR and KO man is not sexy and people might not know who he is when gives his speech but C'mon Man, give it to the guy who made the two biggest games and tied a Super Bowl record.  Also, no one has a cooler TD dance than Jones, that has to count for something right?


7. Colin Kaepernick is the real deal. I get it, he lost but for a guy who has started less than 10 career games to bring his team back from a 28-6 deficit using his legs and arm is incredible. We are looking at a future Superstar. Some of the crossing routes that he threw to Michael Crabtree in particular may have clocked in at 90 MPH. The man has a cannon attached to his body where his right arm should be and roadrunner's legs when he takes off. Start the 2014 MVP.


8. Ed Reed may be the greatest safety to ever play the game. Apologies to Ronnie Lott, but this man is always in the right place at the right time and he does not drop easy interceptions that a lot of defensive backs. Yea, the INT by Kaepernick was a poor overthrow, but how often do you see quarterbacks over throw the receiver and ball land harmlessly on the ground, not when Ed Reed is playing center field. His instincts on the ball are amazing, but he is from the U so I am inclined to dislike him.

9. I still hate Ray Lewis. Stop Crying.  I will not be sad when week one of next season opens and no one is doing a stupid dance during the introductions. I am actually surprised that the Ravens came out as a team and self serving Ray did not "encourage" them to allow him to come out alone. Also, stop laying on the field and praying while wearing a shirt with a giant cross on it. Not that I am opposed to Lewis finding God, but we get it, you do not have to lay on the ground just to prove to us that you are religious now.

Also, you were an accessory to murder.

 

10. I still REALLY HATE ART MODELL.